Endless

In the beginning of my recovery I often wondered how healing my childhood sexual abuse, emotional trauma, and addiction could transform my life. For so many years, as a young woman and mother, I felt as if I had messed up my life beyond repair. This type of thinking caused me to stay stuck in toxic emotions that fed both grief and pain. I could not comprehend a life that did not involve waves of physical, emotional, and spiritual chaos. 

Fast forward to last night.... I am posting a poem that Marley, my youngest daughter, wrote for her English class. Overwhelmed by my own emotions from a super-charged day of speaking and telling my story to women, my eyes welled up with tears of joy as she so vibrantly read her poem out loud. She performed her poem for me as if she was acting on a Broadway stage. Looking to me for praise, she noticed my tears. She fluttered over to me and paused. 

She knelt to my level, kissed my cheeks, and said "Mommy, the dream is in your eyes, born in your soul and ready for you to awaken to." 

In an instant, any confusion and uncertainty vanished. The work I have done is now working in them. All three of us have committed to a life of perpetual forward motion and change. With help, a lot of help, I found the solution to my spiritual sickness. Steps were taken and action is applied in my daily life that keeps me in alignment with my recovery goals. 

The gift of all this hard work is that I am now a conscious, sober, single mother in recovery. I never thought this would be possible. Today, life is limitless, joy-filled, and breathtaking. At times life still has the power to bring me to my knees with fear over the unknown, financial insecurity, and earthly woes, but hope has replaced despair. My girls, who are now 12 and 14, have not only benefited tremendously from my growth during sobriety and recovery, it has illuminated the magic that can only be felt from being fully present in the MIRACLE of life.

 

Endless

The dream is in this girl
She is seeking the treasure
Move your joy to power
You deserve a thrilling future
Open your mind of space
Where time always gets less
Only the first of lights
Rumble these lazy thoughts
Through the day we glide
To be asleep in the end
By: Marley Edwards
Greeting Cards Don't Tell My Story

Greeting Cards Don't Tell My Story

I Was Never Enough

I Was Never Enough